"Taking That Ride"
So I'm on the train this morning and I am looking at this woman who's probably in her late 40's early 50's but she has spectacular round cans and they're not drooping. She was German so she probably smells a bit and her butch haircut was none too impressive but yet I couldn't stop thinking about and wondering what those orbs look like unsheathed. Not to mention what they must have been in their hayday and if, in fact, given the chance, would I go there.
Where am I going with all this? Nowhere. That's the whole point. And if our efforts and play continue like last nights debacle that's where we're headed. In the words of George Jetson, "Jane!! Stop this crazy thing!!!"
Bears 7
Here Dogs 19
Season: 2-2
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The Positives:
No one was seriously injured or died. Yup. That's all I got. If you can think of any...oh wait, the ump sold us two brand new balls for only $10. Let me know if anything else springs to mind.
The Negatives:
All of it: Sad but true. We were abysmal in pretty much every aspect of the game. Hitting, fielding, pitching (though solid effort from two people who don't normally play the position), fundamentals, throwing, the whole nine yards. We have to master the basics at least. We are absolutely killing ourselves with errors in the field and in the brain. I do it too so don't think I'm singling anyone out. It's going to be a LONG season if we don't figure something out soon. I know we're out to have fun but I also know no one wants to be a part of that every week. What's the point? Lecture over.
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Ok, it's time for "The Geico "Bears" Player of the Game" Award!!
Each week the 'Cap selects a player for the G-POG.This award is for an individual(s) who displays
outstanding play in the field, at the plate, or in
the bar. It can be game saving, heroic, or maybe
just shatting one's pants sliding into third.
And now, presenting this weeks winner...(drum roll..)
The Wookie Girl at the bar!!!!!!
That's right ladies and gentlemen, due to unspectacular play all around the only thing that gave us any pleasure for the evening was seeing Chewbacca's kid sister ordering drinks and hanging with her pals at the 'ol watering hole! An unprecedented act in G-POG history! Congratulations Sasquatch, you are this weeks "Geico Bears Player of the Game!!!"
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Each week the Bears head to Brother Jimmy's on 80th & Amsterdam for some Ice cold $2 beers, shots of Patron, delicious wings and rib tips, an amazingly hot bartender, and God willing, unsuspecting young ladies willing to stroke the ego's of men who cling to the belief that they still "got it". During these endeavors, some interesting things can be "Overheard at the Bar".
This weeks episode: "Gillette Has Met It's Match"
After getting ready to wrap up a light night at the canteen, in walks a big 'ol group of women for our perusal. After assessing the situation, some quips were noted:
Buddy: "Oh Jesus. It looks like a pack of cubs from the Ugly Forrest."
Jarrett: "Holy Shit!! I kid you not! Look at the girl in the purples shirt! Did anyone see that?? Those are the hairiest fucking arms! I'm not joking!!"
And my friends, he wasn't kidding. Before long, we were all completely fixated. If her body was blocked and all you saw were her arms grabbing beers, you would have sworn Big Foot just bellied up. We took turns going to the bathroom just to lay eyes on the phenomenon. So much so that a perfect stranger interjected between Rob G's and Tommy O's discussion on it (in the head) and ventured out for his very own eyeful of surreal patch. Whoa.
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Other Business: Whatever slackers that haven't paid Ken need to do so before I start publicly calling you out!!!!
NEXT GAME: Wednesday, April 21st, 7:30 PM, Field #2 vs. Dub Squad
You think they're not going to be gunning for us after our last meeting? Think again. They also beat Charter last night. We need an A game to put last night away and get us back over .500. Let's channel whatever the hell it was from the first meeting and get it done.
With a highly explosive backside to you all...
- James Buddy "I Can't Believe the Co-Pilot of the Millennium Falcon Was Here!" Villani
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